We love throwing a good party! But let’s talk money. When I attend kids’ parties (okay, or any elaborate party, for that matter), I’m often curious about the cost of it all. How much was that bounce house? The caterer? And if you’re a friend who’s curious about ours, here we go! We’ll get into it for the first time — and certainly not the last time.
This is our third 1st birthday (3rd child), so we’ve improved our party planning skills over the years. We place more focus and money on the details of the party that children can especially enjoy. Because when the children have a good time, the parents can have a good time, sit back, and enjoy (the food). Per usual, we had roughly 100 guests attend the celebration.
We go all out on food
Food is our love language, so it’s such an important (and the most expensive) element of our parties. Looking back on all the parties we’ve hosted, the one thing I regret spending money on is the one-time use decor that I bought just to enhance the party theme. It feels wasteful in the aftermath when they’re ruined (and non-reusable), and the person who appreciates it the most is probably just me. Did my kid take any notice? (No.) Did the guests? Maybe a few here and there — fellow party planning moms. I also don’t prioritize favors because they feel unnecessary, and a lot of them get left behind.
Our party theme was “The One-derful Things Haven Will Be” based on the book The Wonderful Things You Will Be by Emily Winfield. We took it a step further to encapsulate the things we want Haven to be and to have: the fruits of the Spirit. [Insert picture of the backdrop] I bought the book years ago for my kids’ home library, and I simply used that as a sign-in guest book. The DIY decor and backdrop reflected this theme. The cost to this was simply the time and labor of love that went into it — plus the sunk cost of a Cricut machine, which was gifted to me, and a previously purchased (from a retired event planner during the height of the pandemic) backdrop panel. The best part was that I repurposed the Cricut-made decorations! The paper balloons are now displayed above my baby girl’s crib in her bedroom.
It’s a kids’ party. If the kids are happy, the parents are happy.
I said what I said about favors, but this time, I did choose to have them. I bought these cute little plastic boxes from the Target dollar section for $1 each, and I used my label-maker to label each box — 1 per family. 3 kids meant 3 kids’ name labels on 1 box. I thought it’d be so practical for kids to use at the party to fill it at the snack bar and to take home to use for whatever purpose, like holding snacks or crafts. I still see our friends using them to this day! Mission accomplished. Reusability and practicality are so important to me.
As for children’s activities, I organized DIY craft stations. Most of our friends’ kids, like ours, are in the infant-5yo range, with a handful of 5+yo outliers. While we’ve always had a bounce house (whether rented or our personally purchased one) for entertainment, I wanted to spread out the fun with engaging, motor-skill-encouraged stations. One was a DIY dinosaur terrarium craft. Kids placed sand, artificial moss, artificial palm trees, rocks, and finally mini dinosaur action figures into their terrarium (plastic jars). I bought all these inexpensive items on Temu and Amazon, and the craft was a hit, especially among the boys. I think the opportunity to dig into a sandbox won them over. In addition, I had set up a DIY custom sunglasses craft station, where the kids could choose a pair of kid-sized sunglasses and stick on friendship-bracelet-type beads. This one required parental supervision for the use of the hot glue gun. This was also such a hit, especially among the girls! I absolutely loved seeing them walk around with their new sunglasses and boost of confidence.
As for the main course, we went all out on a Chinese feast, including a roasted pig. This was our biggest expense of the party by far and so worth it. The only problem was that we over-ordered (also quite a few friends who canceled last minute due to illness), so it was leftovers galore. I asked the restaurant to bring takeout boxes so our friends could box up food to take home. It was truly splendid.
Here’s the cost breakdown:
I didn’t mention the venue
Before you assume I’ve missed a huge expense, let me address that I am fully aware we don’t pay for a venue! If I did, the cost would probably be an additional $500-$1,000. For this number of guests (100+), a venue rental is typically necessary. We’ve been extremely blessed to have a home/space to host celebrations this large. We recognize that this part of our experience is extremely atypical. Along with the venue, the tables/chairs we have are a sunk cost to us because of the initial investment we made 7+ years ago in purchasing them for all our future gatherings. It’s more than paid off.
Why do we have such big celebrations? I know, some people cannot fathom. But we love our community, and we see it as an opportunity for a reunion of all the friends and family we hold dear in our lives, of old and recent. We also sincerely want to invite our community into our lives to celebrate our family’s milestones. Part of doing life together is celebrating together. We’ve been blessed to have such a growing community, and we try hard to nurture these friendships/relationships even when we have low capacity/minimal time/full hands/full plates, whatever you want to call it. We also love gathering, hosting, and blessing others.
We’re a no-gifts type of host
This may seem like a lot to spend on a birthday, but as a family, we spend little on ourselves and way more on memorable experiences. We also always have a no-gift request on our invitations for many reasons. (1) We don’t want anyone to feel the pressure of buying a gift, especially last minute, to attend our party. (2) We are empathetic to people’s financial situations. We don’t have to know, we just understand regardless. (3) Vay and I grew up with little, so gifts were never our love language. We rarely received them. This means we’re especially grateful when we do, but we don’t prioritize it. And don’t get me wrong — we love to give, but we’re ethnically and semi-culturally Chinese, and receiving a gift can be challenging. (4) We’re pretty minimalistic. Does our home reflect that? Not in this season of life, not with the clutter. But in my heart, I am.
When the kids are grown, someday, we’ll miss these parties and gatherings. For now, we’re embracing them full-force.
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